Life Happens

I don't know about any of you (are any of you still out there - it's been so long) but I can be inclined at times to think way too much. And this has even been independently and objectively confirmed. When we lived in K-town, I worked at an online career development company and had lots of access to different personality and aptitude testing. Okay, it's perhaps a little less objective when you have access to the code, you're providing all the answers yourself and can take the test over and over. But when we were candidates for MAF, we did a fairly extensive personality assessment, with evaluations from different people who knew us. It was one of those four quadrant systems and I landed securely in the thinker's corner: Analytical-Analytical.
So when it comes to the big things in life, I rather like to take in all the info I can and weigh it all out. Pray about it, too, for sure, but the point is I like to be pretty sure of where I'm going and my best options for getting there. But sometimes, while I'm busy processing the data and mapping out the alternatives, life happens.
And life is exactly what happened about eight weeks ago, though it took us awhile to figure it out. It was three and a half weeks ago now that we learned, quite unexpectedly, that that same life was then five weeks along as the doctors count, and growing inside me. There've been some hurdles to overcome, and it's not been an easy three weeks emotionally, but a second ultrasound yesterday showed, unofficially, that everything seems to be on track.
Naturally, I'm back to thinking and processing all the new implications, but I reached a few conclusions pretty quickly. One of the biggest questions I was thinking, debating and praying about over the last number of months was whether I'd be able to handle another. Becoming mama to Tweetie's been a wonderful experience so far, and I certainly wouldn't go back for a minute, but it's also been incredibly hard on a lot of levels. The nature of this pregnancy cries out divine intervention, so I take great hope from the thought that God seems to think we can handle it. And since we made no active decision and did nothing to help this along (ok, well obviously we did something, but let's not get into those details) I can't spend the next months and years second guessing that choice.

So, there you have it. Life happens, often when and how we least expect it. And if all continues to go well, Tweetie will be a big sister next year, and there'll be a whole new wave of pregnancy and motherhood flotsam washing up on the coast in the meantime.